Tune Ups, Tunings, & Car Tunes

by Tom & Ellen Demarest

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credits

released July 8, 2014

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Tom & Ellen Demarest Corvallis, Oregon

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Track Name: The Corner Garage
The Corner Garage
Tom Demarest 11/27/03
© Oregrown Music 2003
VERSE I:
It was just like the guy told me, down at the Corner Garage.
He said “Son it’s headin’ for ya! It’s a bullet you can’t dodge.
You best quit your messin’ ‘round...fix this car or don’t leave town.
Gonna leave you high an dry when your chips are down.
How did he know it?...How did he know?
Is he some kind a prophet, or am I just a schmo?
He must have seen a vision I dismissed for a mirage
Don’t take the words to lightly friend, you hear at the Corner Garage.

VERSE II:
This lady right behind me brings her Beemer to this guy.
I looked around in disbelief ... I just had to ask her “Why?”
“I said you must know the dealer?” She said “Yes I surely do.
I bought his yacht, but this guy here, he paddles a canoe.”
I think she knows it. I think she knows
She ain’t buyin’ no more tickets to that Beemer dealer’s show
No more lattes in the waiting room with the “Customer Massage”
But the Beemer’s runnin’ perfect, when she leaves the Corner Garage.

VERSE III:
His coveralls are denim, his toolbox isn’t red
But your car is always ready exactly when he said
You might see a Lamborghini parked right next to some old Dodge
All you gotta do....is get it to....the guy at the Corner Garage.
Then you will know it... Then you will know
He’s in it for the challange....it’s not about your dough!
The truth is he’s an artist, all these cars are his collage.
When you find him you’ll know him, he’s the guy at the Corner Garage.
Track Name: The Bug Is Back
The Bug is Back...
(with a vengsance!)
Tom Demarest 9/5/03

VERSE I:
They say if you remember the ‘60s, you must not have really been there.
In those days of compulsive obsessions with flowers, music, and hair.
To be hip you had to be at the happening, to be cool you had to own a guitar!
And all for the love of the planet...
The Beatle was the only cool car.

CHORUS:
Now the Bug is back....with a vengance! A cute car with an attitude!
So tired of all the Fords and Chevys, flyin’ by and being so rude.
You can get yours with a turbo, fuel injection, cruise and AC.
It hardly makes a sound..... may be a little too round,
But hey, It looks like a Beetle to me.

VERSE II:
We would freeze in the Beetle all winter, we’d swelter when we drove in July
But a ten dollar bill would fill up the tank and the speed limit never applied.
And if the Beetle broke down on the way into town we carried all it took to survive.
We had the mother Earth News, and the Rolling Stone,
And the Volkswagon Idiot’s Guide

VERSE III: If you had told me that the Bug would be back, I’d‘ve said now don’t be absurd!
Then all of a sudden...I saw one glide by and I stumbled right over the curb.
The Studebaker-Packards, & the Hudsons are gone, Edsel was a blip on our screen.
But while the memory survives and the boomers still drive,
You know the Beetle will be part of the scene.
Track Name: I Never Wanted A Subaru!
Su-ba-ru
Written by Tom Demarest April 18, 2001

REFRAIN:
Su----ba-ru, I never wanted a Su----ba-ru,
But it was free, so what else could I do? I started drivin’ a Su----ba-ru.
Su----ba-ru, my friend he gave me this Su----ba-ru!!
I love the milage now, you know I do! So now I’m diggin’ this Su----ba-ru


VERSE I:
With all the kids in this family, I’ve always needed an SUV,
They’ve been old & klunky, nothin’ but funky,
But the kids all sit where they can see.
I can take all the “stuff”, I can pull that boat,
But fillin’ the tank puts a lump in my throat.
I think we’ll do next year’s sights on DVD....and do our drivin’ in a....


VERSE II:
G
In my youth I drove an Austin Healy. My kids hear that and say “Sure, Dad really!!”
It sure was fine, ....could turn on a dime,
And the gas was twenty-nine point nine.
Had a “Cherry” Olds and a neat Old Chevy,
A pick-up truck that I drove to the levy,
But the levy wasn’t dry and the music did not die....and now I’m singin’ ‘bout a..
Track Name: You Had It Last!
You Had It Last
Tom Demarest 9/20/03
© Oregrown Music 2003
VERSE I:
I IV
Well the telephone rang late the other day, just as I was puttin’ my tools away
I V
And the voice at the other end says “This here is Fred”.
I IV
I was just about to say “Well hi!” when he goes right on to say “Now I’m the guy
I V I ----------V
That had his car towed in last week cuzin’ it was dead?”.
I IV
As I’m tryin’ to recall just who he was he says “Now I’m only callin’ you because
I V
It’s been runnin’ real great and I thought you’d like to know”.
I IV
Well that made me feel a bit relieved ‘til he says “Just one thing has got me peeved
I V I
All my favorite shows is gone from the radio”


CHORUS: (Second Chorus)
IV I
“And since you had it last and I’m sure that you had a blast..
(Yes I did have it last, and I did consider a blast..)
V I
Got to use all your tools just to do what you love to do.
(Or a wrecking ball or a well placed bullet or two!)
IV I
Now we both know that you’re the only one that could’a did..., whatever was done
(Now I’ve always thought that I was cheap but then I laid eyes on your old heap.)
V IV I
It seems “restitution” is something we might pursue?.”
(But that radio is baby-spankin’ new!) [Tag chorus pick-up “He said you…..”]

VERSE II: Restitution???

I heard a lawyer’s voice when Fred spoke that word, like it mighta’ been somethin’ that he just heard

Watchin’ Judge Judy or the Andy Griffith show.

Recallin’ Fred & his beat up car, and first impressions bein’ what they are...

“Restitution” didn’t seem like a word that he would know.

So I tried to explain “Well Fred you see, a lot of things spin when you turn that key

So your battery was disconnected for an hour or so.”

Like that blinking light on your VCR the high tech geeks have invaded your car!

So get the kid next door to re-set your radio.”
Track Name: Old Car Fools
Old Car Fools
Tom Demarest 8/19/03

VERSE I:
I
Thought I could kick the habit, so I gave my old car away

To the guy next door in my neighborhood, you know it really made his day.
IV
But now his wife won‘t speak to my wife. She just glares when she jogs by.
I
She says “How could you do it to him? He was just an ordinary guy.
V IV
But now he’s just like you!!...... he keeps needin’ more ...... tools!!
V IV I
You turned a good man into one-a-them old car fools!!”


CHORUS:
IV
When you get hooked on them Old Cars, you start loosin’ your old freinds.
I
Cause you‘re always lookin’ and you can’t stop talkin’ bout the way they were way back when...
IV
But everytime you let someone else drive and you’re sittin’ on the passenger side,
V IV I
It gets real clear that it’s all about looks---not ride!


VERSE II:
I
Me and my high school buddies, oh what cars we had!!

If we had them today you know things wouldn’t be so bad...
IV
But now they’re all in that junkyard of busted worn out dreams
I
And if you’ve seen one like the one you had, then you know what I mean.
V IV
You can remember the feel... and you remember how far....
V IV I
You remember the first time you drove that old car.


VERSE III:
I
There’s a show on Sunday morning, comes on right after church.

You’ll never hear better old car talk, no matter where you search.
IV
So if you’re fightin yours.... they way I fight with mine.
I
Take a break from your wrenchin’....and pay close attention when they start to feed us the line.
V IV
It’s just a matter of fact..... most folks don’t know jack....
V IV I
That’s why we all keep listenin’ to “Click & Clack”. ------ (Cause....)
Track Name: A Real Man .... Can Fix The Car!
A Real Man
Tom Demarest 4/22/03

VERSE I:
I
Now we hear alot ‘a talk about “The Real Men”,...how they go for it all... and they never count to ten.
IV I
Now we’ve all met them, and we know who they are.
I
Some are “big deal makers”, some are “good ole boys”. They play “Hey, watch this!!” with their big boy toys,
IV V I
But a Real Man.....I say a real, Real Man...he can fix the car.


CHORUS:
IV V I IV
Real men can fix the car, they know fine wine and a good cigar,
I V
And they can fit right in, no matter where they are.
IV V I IV
They’ll never leave you at the side of life’s road cause they know what to do without bein’ told,
I V I
They’ll help you find where you’re at, and besides all that....they’re gonna fix the car.


VERSE II:
I
When a girl get down, when she’s feeling’ low, she can be hard to help but she likes to know
IV I
That there’s a real man not far away.
I
In the “day to days” of the “heart to hearts”, there will be those times when life is hard to start.
IV V I
But with a Real Man...I say a real Real Man....You’re gonna be O.K.

VERSE III:
I
In our lives today there’s so much to do, that you forget about me and I forget about you
IV I
And every one says, “That’s just the way things are.”
I
We’ve got all this “stuff” that really doesn’t count and when we gotta get out and pressure mounts.
IV V I
We’ll never get there....we can’t go anywhere....if the car won’t start.
Track Name: In A Pre-Prius World
A Pre Prius World
Tom Demarest 6/21/08

Acapella Intro:
Now the world’s getting’ greener as emissions get cleaner
You can barely hear the hybrids roll by!
Sure as cactus is cacti and fungus is fungi
We all better start drivin’ “Prii”?

Verse I:
I
Back in a Pre Prius World, Friday night meant drivin’ with your steady girl
IV I
Call it “Cruzin’ The Strip”, “Draggin’ Main”, or “Toolin’ The Gut”, it was all the same.
I
Chrome was king, loud pipes were good, and if you talked that talk and your bluff was good
IV V I
You could lie about havin’ a turbo under the hood!


Refrain:
I IV I
But now the world’s getting’ greener as emissions get cleaner
I V I
You can barely hear the hybrids roll by!
IV I V I
Sure as cactus is cacti and fungus is fungi we all better start drivin’ “Prii”?


Verse II:
I
Back in those Pre Prius days the corner gas station was a happenin’ place.
IV I
You could talk to the kid & he’d clean all the glass, wave to your friends as they’d honk & pass.
I
The kid would check the oil, top the tank with care, fill up your tires if they needed air.
IV V I
Try and find service like that, now, anywhere!


Verse III:
I
Today they all look the same. The coefficient of drag is the name of the game.
IV I
They all slide through the air, with barely a sound. How could the shape be anything but round?
I
The fins are gone, along with all the chrome and they cost twice as much as your childhood home!
IV V I
Today we “owe our soul to the company” auto loan!
Track Name: Somebody Like Me (Got Car Blues?)
Somebody Like Me
(The Car Blues)
Tom Demarest 6/21/08

Verse I:
I V I
Every woman needs to know somebody like me,
I V
A guy who understands what happens when you turn that key.
I
We might not come to mind when you’re hopin’ for a date,
IV7
But when you’re cryin’ on the shoulder of that Interstate,
I V I
We’re at the top of your list of the guys you’d love to see,

Refrain:
I IV I
Somebody like me, somebody like me.
I V
Everybody has a day when they need somebody like me.
I
You know “We can’t live with ‘em, can’t live without ‘em”
IV
Ole’ Hank said “there’s somethin’ mighty necessary ‘bout ‘em.”
I V I
When you get “Car Blues” you want somebody like me.


Verse II:
(V) I V I
Now our cars may be old but they do look pretty good,
I V
We can name and reach everything underneath that hood.
I
That doesn’t mean we don’t appreciate the frills you got
IV7
But when you’re stuck out on the highway they don’t mean a lot.
I V I
Getting’ home is all you’re wantin, if you only could.